Sleeping with one person is sleeping with many...

Today was my first time in the HIV ward. Today is the first time I shook a HIV positive person's hand. Today I had the most physical contact with HIV infected people in my life.

Its shocking how all my patients today were male. And gay. Some of them were open about their illness (he was a lovely old man), others hid their problems away (his mom didn't know he was infected), others are depressed and suicidal that they are this way (he was sexually abused as a boy by his brother and hamsap old neighbour, became gay, had a partner who comitted suicide, another died in a tsunami, and to top it all off, his asshole of a new boyfriend drugged him, raped him while he was out and that's how he got infected. Because the guy lied about his sexual history and claimed he was clean). All were so very sick, one had eyes that were red like the demon's! It would have shocked me but thanks to watching the latest episode of House MD where the fella's eyeballs somewhat exploded with blood, i had been de-sensitised lol. Another was blind due to all the infections he suffered whilst his immune system was smashed from the HIV. Its all very sad.

Its even more ironic that yesterday's episode of Grey's Anatomy had a scenario back in the 70's where HIV was called GRID (gay related immune deficiency) and all the doctors acted like he had the plague, wouldn't even touch him or eneter his room. And here I was shaking their hands, ungloved. How the times have changed!

So moral of the story people, don't jump into bed without making sure the person is HIV free, and dont just take their word for it. See the actual paper for yourself. And always practice safer sex, just in case. And life doesn't have to end if you get infected. Its just not very nice.

Pervy Old Men

Pervy, hampsap old men. Everybody has one (tale to tell, that is).

And so I was on the train to Sydney, alone, snoozing. Then I felt the train stop at a station and got jolted awake. Old man enters, sit in the seat next to the seat opposite mine. Thank god my seat was a single, or esle he wouldve sat next to me and it would be torture. The seat opposite me was occupied by my luggage.

Anyhoo, at this point he seemed nice enough, I tried to move my luggage to give him more space and he was all "no no no, its ok its ok" and tells me to leace my luggage as it is. Then he makes some smal talk and along the conversation said that he was originally from Europe. So I asked which part of Europe he's from.

Biggest. Freaking. Mistake.

He says Hamburg, and I'm like ohhh Hamburg. *mutter* Wheres that *mutter*

And he sits up and then starts touching my leg (mid-thigh) and goes "Oh you wanna go to Hamburg? I have frequent flyer tickets, you wanna go to Hamburg with me???" *pats my leg, gives me this uber hamsap grandpa look*

Me: *polite-akward smile, nervous laughter* eh-heh-heh?
Inner Me: Imma break your fingers off old man!!!!! GRRRRRRR
Old man: Yes yes, I will get a double room for us and tell people how I am travelling with my neice... oh double room meaning 2 beds not a double bed of course, not that you would want to sleep with an old uncle like me.. *leers pervertedly again*
Me: Still politely smilling and more nervous fake laughter. Inner self is spazzing at the audacity of the old man. Uncle? UNCLE??!!! Who are you kidding gramps, you're old enough to be my great grandpa.
Old man: *i think he catches on to me being creeped out* Heheh. Yes, laugh is always good. *Pats my leg again*

Throughout the journey he kept asking me things like where I live, where I'm going to live in Sydney, where I work etc etc. being totally creepy. This is not how you talk to random strangers in the train. And then he pulls out his camera phone. And the fucker attempts to take a picture of me =_=|| . I stick my hand in front of the lens to stop him. He fiddles summore with the phone and tries to showoff/ pretend to be stupid aout not knowing how to use it to some random bogan teenagers. At this point I am glad that he's no longer talking to me and I stare pointedly out the window. I really really really wanna sleep, but I have to keep my guard up. Stupid old man. He then starts rambling on about computer problems and asks the kids if they know how to fix it. Again I am not sure if he is showing off by feigning ignorance and trying to impress me that he has money as he can afford snazzy cam phones ( "I have also another one" *pulls out yet another snazzy phone from pocket*) and shop on Ebay.

I am still staring pointedly out the window, occasionally looking out the corner of my eye to make sure he's not sneaking some pics of me. He does things to attract my attention like clapping his hands and making fun of another sleeping and loudly snoring passenger. I just politely smile at his antics and keep quiet. But my inner self wants to smash my head against the window repeatedly and wishes the train ride would end. Like, now.

He gets me really irritated by asking if I had a camera. I had earlier said I did not, my phone does not have one, and I lied about not having one at all. He insists its in my bag. I say i only have books in my bag. He insists again, saying he saw a long oblong case (those were my sunglasses). I get highly irritated and say its books, i pull out a book and show him. I nearly reach snapping point when he tried reaching out for my bag, i snatch it away and hug it protectively. He backs down and says "ok ok u dont have to show me".

My patience is wearing really thin now. I think i was one step away from my stop, about 10 to 15 minutes to go, when i decide I would put my luggage near the door so that I dont get obstructed by or obstruct other people when leaving coz its a mad rush usually. So I start with my heaviest piece of luggage. I get up and reach out for it. The old man tries to pull the bag away from me.

Old Man: No no no, sit down sit down, still 10 more minutes!!
Me: *Fighting for the peice of luggage, tugging it back* I. Have. To. Put. This. Near.The.Door.
Old Man: *Tug of war-ing with me* Sit.. Sit... plenty of time. *Tries to push me back into my seat*

My patience snaps. I pull myself to my very full height (it felt like i was puffing up) and say very loudly and sternly "NO. I am going to put this near the door!". I myself am surprised by the hardness and stern-ness of my voice. The "No" sounded really firm and eventhough I was not yelling it, it resonated throughout the cabin. And it sounded like it was full of loathing and contempt, something like Lord Voldemort would say in a cold calm voice and leave all his Death Eaters shaking with shit in their pants.

I must have really shocked him because his jaw just drops and he sinks back in his seat. Not such the demure, tiny, asian female he thinks I am. I grab my luggage and stomp off. I come back and grab my second luggage peice. I go back for my laptop, and he hands it to me trying to be nice again "your computer"..

I snatch it, say thanks in a frosty way, and walk towards the exit without turning back. He does not follow. The train pulls into the station. I breathe a sigh of deep relief and all the pent up anger and frustration is let out.

Ironically, what I had for lunch following that sleepless nightmare ride was sushi train. Lol. I was so happy at the end of my meal that i was swinging my legs in joy. I also found out that the best place to have a meal alone is at a sushi train or counter style dining. Just you, and the food. No need to stare at an empty seat accross the table and worry that some random stranger will occupy it. Unless creepy old men who sit next to you at the counter start making pervy small talk and being creepy old fucks in general. Then i suggest you empty your hot green tea (its cheaper than the cold ones and usually refill is free!) onto his lap and run for the exit.

Somewhere away from my usual place

Sorry for the lack of update. No its not blog-death. 

I have been away on placements for the last 3 weeks at Taree and Forster. The lack of innternet connection and privacy meant no blogging as I could be potentialy caught bitching about the very people I live with lol.

Buuut as one of them has gone home for the weekend, and the other out for a walk, this means I have the complete freedom to bitch and blah about EVERYTHING! Yahoo!

Oh, and if my post suddenly just gets cut off and ends weirdly, it just means one of my fellow roomies have returned and back to blog-death until the next time i get some alone time lol.

But so far its been okay. Taree is a small and picturesque little town. The workload has been light and relatively relaxing. I am being involved in establishing baseline data for a primary school before they get this awesome kitchen-garden thingy implemented. Their school is right next to the beach! Those lucky little buggers :D. But basically all I am doing now is data entry and report writing. So dry and blah!

I returned home to Newcastle for the past 2 weekends. The first was to renew library books and use internet lol. The second was to hang out with some friends. We went down to Sydney for the horse races and a night out. Horrid weather aside, along with money flying out of my pocket at an impressive speed, it was a pretty good weekend. I let a drunken guy crawl over me and put his face in my chest lol. He was drunk, I hate him with a passion, but because he was drunk and won't remember, I took advantage of him. Hah. Usually its the other way around no??

This weekend i did not go back to Newy, choosing instead to see what Taree has to offer on weekends. After a night of karaoke, and by karaoke i mean standing in front of the whole pub and singing into a mic. I sang "Take a chance" by ABBA. Cringe worthy. I believe i mumbled "sorry, sorry..." into the mic a few times. Then adrenaline kicked in and i managed to yell my way (in tune!) to the end. There is this beardy medical student with funky hair who came with us, and I thought he was cool in a beardy way coz we went out on Wednesday night and he seemed very nice. Anyways he looked like he was flirting with my friend. And he came back with us for a while. Then we made plans to have breakkie together.

So we had breakkie together. I felt like a lampost/third wheel the whoooole time. Not to mention, being the pig I am, I managed to wolf my breakfast down in half the time they took to finish their meals. Great. Plus trying not to stare are Dr Beardy. Which made me look like I was disinterested and bored. What an asshat I am.

I am trying not to be akward to my friend either. Because yes, I am a teensy weensy bit jealous, eventhough I have no logical reason to be jealous as a) he is not mine, and never was and b)there was no chance to begin with. 

However I am just frustrated that the guys I always like always end up going for someone around me but not me!!! Like I said before, is something wrong with me?? I don't mean it like "dude, you gotta like me. We should be, like, a couple. Actually lets get married right now. I want your babies.". I would just like to skip all the parts and jump to the process of "I want your babies". In fact just plain flirting is nice, because its suuuuuuuuuch a boost to your self confidence and ego! Ask me out for a movie dammit!

Logically speaking I only have another 1 and a half weeks to go here. So I don;t expect much. I know I am being emo-emo abit now, but give me a few days and I shall recover and be back to normal! :D

On another non-boy related note, my wisdom tooth is acting up again with a stupidly serious case of pericoronitis. This is the second time this year, and the worst because I have to frequently drain and press pus out of the gums which still cover the damn tooth. Yucks. Plus it hurts so much. And I am afraid of Ludwigs angina. Damn you, OSHC, for not covering the costs of dental!

And damn me, for being old enough to be getting teeth of wisdom! Wisdom my ass!