Like a Virgin

Only that i'm not being touched for the very first time.

Make that not being touched at all.

Yes, its official. In the land of Oz, i am the last remaining virgin (ooh cherry red for an unpopped cherry!) among my friends. It sucks that we started out on the same level but now they've gone where i havent gone before, so to speak.

Not that i mind much or anything... but i'm beginning to wonder if there is something physically or psychologically wrong with me? I mean, do i have an extra arm sticking out the crack of my arse that i'm not aware of? Do i scream murderous thoughts out in my sleep? OR WORSE, can people actually hear my often preverted and strange thoughts out loud when i'm staring into space??

Or is it because i weird guys out when they catch me staring at their crotch region most of the time (god, i am depraved ( ￣っ￣) ... ) hey i am short OK its not my fault that it "so happens" to be in my line of sight!

is my left hand going to be my only lover?? (man do i sound like a man!) will i end up as the 50-year old virgin?? FOREVER??

AND EVER!!!??!!?!!! *dundundun ominous sound effect!*